Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships

At our core, we’re not just wired for sex—we’re wired for deep connection with another human being. In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Justin Garcia, leading sex researcher, evolutionary biologist, and Executive Director of the Kinsey Institute, who shares the science behind why humans are driven to bond, love, and seek intimacy. We explore how modern dating both supports and disrupts our natural instinct to pair bond, what choices like staying single or exploring nontraditional relationships mean in that context, and why even when connection feels hard to find it’s still fundamentally what we’re built for.

To learn more about Dr. Justin Garcia follow him @drjustingarcia and go to https://kinseyinstitute.org/. Get his new book 'The Intimate Animal: The Science of Sex, Fidelity, and Why We Live & Die For Love' wherever books are sold.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE

Our Sponsors:
* Avocado Green Mattress: Check out their mattress and furniture sale: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/DATEABLE
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable


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Why do we place so much weight on being chosen and what does it actually get us? In this episode, we dig into how we’ve confused attention with real investment and chased validation instead of asking whether we felt genuinely valued. We reflect on the subtle ways performative dating shows up and how societal pressure keeps us focused on being picked and why the relationships worth having are built more so much more than simply being chosen. Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE

Our Sponsors:
* Avocado Green Mattress: Check out their mattress and furniture sale: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/DATEABLE
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable


Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We all know our attachment styles greatly impact how we show up in dating and relationships, but what do we do if we have anxious or avoidant tendencies? We’re joined by attachment expert Thais Gibson, who shares how we can rewire our brains and nervous system to feel more secure. We discuss the ways that our childhood wounds directly correlate to our attachment styles, how to reprogram the subconscious beliefs that leak into our love lives, and why it's completely possible to reprogram your attachment style so you can date in a way that feels liberating.

To learn more about Thais Gibson follow her @thepersonaldevelopmentschool and go to https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/. Get her new book 'The New Attachment Theory: Heal Every Relationship by Rewiring Your Brain and Nervous System' wherever books are sold.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE

Our Sponsors:
* Avocado Green Mattress: Check out their mattress and furniture sale: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/DATEABLE
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable


Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you’ve ever questioned whether a relationship is “right” you’re not alone. In this episode, we unpack how our understanding of healthy relationships has evolved over time, and why the ones that actually last often feel steady and grounding rather than dramatic or intense. We reflect on past experiences where chemistry and excitement were mistaken for compatibility, and how that mindset kept us stuck in patterns that didn’t truly serve us. Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE

Our Sponsors:
* Avocado Green Mattress: Check out their mattress and furniture sale: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/DATEABLE
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable


Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In a world full of opinions, algorithms, and endless advice, learning to trust yourself has never been harder—or more important. In this episode, we unpack how modern dating and decision-making have become clouded by external noise, from social media to AI, and why reconnecting with your intuition is key to clarity and confidence in dating. We discuss the risks of crowdsourcing every decision, how to build a “self-trust library” through small, consistent actions, and why regaining self-trust will help you massively reduce the time spent on dating to allow you to focus on the good parts!

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE

Our Sponsors:
* Avocado Green Mattress: Check out their mattress and furniture sale: https://avocadogreenmattress.com/DATEABLE
* Quince: Get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable


Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy